Underneath your clothes, there’s an endless story.

Things are different after two babies. My need to start fresh was undeniable, and I was a fool in thinking that what I had would last much longer. Until now, my standards were clearly defined. Most importantly, it had to feel right.  I looked for the perfect blend of sex appeal and comfort. Regardless of my ideal match, sacrifices must be made when a quick fix is necessary. After all, a girl who lives in Lenoir can’t be so picky.

I freshened up and headed to a place where I was guaranteed to get it. It would be easier to leave the kids in the car, but society frowns on that. Kidnapping or freezing to death are too great a risk, you know. I handed Leighton her iPod and said a silent prayer that Lewis would sleep through the whole ordeal. I tried not to think of Chris’s desires. I was doing this for myself, and I made a decision to ignore any feelings of judgment. I was out past 9 with two babies, but I got what I needed. It was in and out in less than fifteen minutes- a quickie. 

Feeling a little cheap, I hurried to the car. My husband wasn’t waiting at home, which only helped justify my decision. I knew my sister would be there, and I prepared myself for her disappointment. Memories of similar situations surfaced, and I thought of the day that I traded my bright blue truck for a plain gray (but super practical!) mini van. I arrived home ready to defend myself: I still value my body, my relationship, my youth. Just because I’m the owner of a brand new pack of Hanes Her Way underwear doesn’t mean my inner Victoria’s Secret self is a thing of the past. Perhaps I’ve accepted the reality that I’m a mother of two who spends most days with elementary school kids and most nights with a 4 month old. Plus, after a brief 15 minutes in the Wal-Mart lingerie aisle, I’ve learned that Hanes has a variety of underappreciated yet budget conscious colors and styles. So for the five nights each week that Baby Lewis is the only boy in my bed, Hanes it is. For those other nights, I’ll splurge for the Hanky Panky.